Sympathy and Graduation Cards are the same thing...right???

UPDATE ON MY LIFE: Yesterday I got vasectomy and mastectomy mixed up. So that was a special moment for me.

I had a slight issue yesterday. I ran out of graduation cards…..so I used sympathy, anniversary, and get well cards instead. Basically, I crossed out the “I’m sorry for your loss” and replaced it with, “Congratulations on Graduating!” it makes my card stand out.

It also shows how cheap I am.

I would like to point out sympathy cards are way cheaper than graduation cards. Why buy a graduation card, when you can just cross out, “I’m sorry for your loss” and replace it with a priceless memory??!

I have a chronic problem. I get into mainstream music five months after the song is released. For example, I heard the song “Thrift Shop” yesterday and I am hooked. I’m worried that there is some sexual meaning behind it that I am not getting. I guess you can say after I heard that “Whistle” was not actually about whistling, I learned that no song is safe.

Today I have to play “Pomp and Circumstance” for graduation so the kids better move it. I mean it, they better walk with purpose. I will not play the song for 20 minutes. I will stand up and start playing a Dub Step 

version of “Pomp and Circumstance” if needed.

You did not just try to make Santa Clause sexy. Go home Taylor. 

YOU ARE WELCOME.