My parents keep getting emails from my school regarding the “Nutrition
Items” I have purchased. I can say one thing with complete confidence I have
purchased nothing nutritious from the lunch room this year.
My dad keeps asking me, “How many bags of Doritos do you buy
in a week?” I would like to say for the record, Doritos are nutritious.
Last
time I checked cheese was a protein.
This “Healthy Kids Act” is a load of garbage. Instead of
curving my “unhealthy” Dorito addiction I instead spend more money buying
several bags of reduced fat Doritos in order to get the same feeling of the
normal Doritos.
My conclusion the “Healthy Kids Act” is a conspiracy to get
children to spend more money and get America out of the recession. I might be a
genius.
I AM ON TO YOU WASHINGTON. I WANT REAL DORITOES BACK AND I
WON’T REST UNTIL I GET THEM.
Bring it on. Have you ever tried to tear a fat kid away from
their Doritos?? Didn’t think so. They would sit on you and win.
In other news, I have a funny Sensai story to report.
The other day I was getting ready to leave the Valley
parking lot when I turned on my car and it did not start. Instead of trying
again I jammed to some One Direction music forgetting about the fact that my
engine was not on.
Once the One Direction song ended I put my car in reverse
ready to pull out. My car did not move. I started freaking out and tried to
take the keys out of Sensai and start again. THE KEYS WOULD NOT COME OUT.
I called my Dad freaking out practically in tears yelling, “MY
CAR WON’T WORK!! I AM STUCK IN THE VALLEY PARKING LOT!!!” My Dad has become accustomed
to me calling with car problems so my hysterical mood did not seem to faze him.
When my Dad got to the parking lot, he looked at my car and
said one thing, “You can’t turn your car on because you are still in reverse.”
MY DAD DROVE 10 MINUTES TO TELL ME I WAS IN REVERSE SO I
COULD NOT DRIVE.
MOST EMBRASSING MOMENT EVER.
There you go folks, Your Daily Brooke Problem.
Remember keep your car in park.
YOU ARE WELCOME.
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