YOU ASKED IT THURSDAY.

IT IS YOU ASKED IT THURSDAY!!!!

What is your idea of a solid Youtube video worth watching? Watch “The Face” and “When the Face Doesn’t Work” by Jenna Marbles. She is my hero. GO WATCH IT NOW.

What are your thoughts on Sporcle? Sporcle is so boring. I feel like my eyes are going to fall out of 

their sockets when I play. I would rather be looking for fives. No fives on Sporcle.

WHERE IS THE POST ABOUT FRENCH CAMP??? Coming soon. Tomorrow.

What is your ideal birthday celebration? Eating cheesecake and Dorritoes, with a five.

What do you think the government should do in response to your birthday? I am honestly offended that my birthday is not a national holiday. School should be let out early and pictures of me should be painted on the street.

Where would you rather be than school on your birthday? A museum. I know it is nerdy, but I have a thing for gift shops and exhibits. Museums are also great places to find fives.

I was supposed to answer some of those questions on my birthday, sorry person who sent the questions.

Yesterday this blog hit 2,000 views!!! Thank you to anyone who has ever read this blog.

Also, all of you should pat yourselves on the back. YOU HAVE SURIVIED THE FIRST TWO DAYS OF BROOKE DRIVING. No one has been injured yet. I just forgot to turn my headlights off. And now my Sensai is in the shop. If my car is in the shop two days after I started driving, I really do not think that is a good sign.

YOU ARE WELCOME.

P.S. French camp tomorrow. I have to mentally prepare myself for reminiscing on the horrors of the dreaded French Camp.

Looking for Fives Day!

With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, it is time to introduce all of you to a new holiday! February 14^th is from now on called “Looking for Fives Day”.Get pumped.

If you are like me, I celebrate "Looking for Fives Day" everyday.

Can I just say that Adam Levine is the definition of a four? He is has all the qualities to be a five BUT he is more attractive than me. :(

I watched The Voice for the first time yesterday. I honestly missed all the sucky singers. The sucky singers make me feel better about my horrid singing voice. I like to think that I have the voice of an angel.

WHY IS CEE LOW GREEN A JUDGE??? He has had ONE hit single. I do not think that makes him an expert. Making Cee Low Green a judge is like making Kim Kardashian the host of a happy marriage show.  

The Voice judges look absolutely hilarious when they are listening to the singers. If there was a bubble of their heads it would say, “I need to look smart so I will crinkle my eyebrows close my eyes.” If I were you, watch 

The Voice but DO NOT listen to the singers. Watch the judges. It is so entertaining.

I got my license today!! If you value your life, GET OFF THE ROADS. Kiss the pavement if you are alive. Brooke and Sensai are the bombs of the road.

YOU ARE WELCOME.

Become a member of Your Daily Dose of Brooke! Follow Your Daily Dose of Brooke on Twitter @BloggingBrooke! Any questions about life? Email me at brooketheblogger@aol.com and I will answer them right on Thursday.

Ya Sports.

Yesterday was the SUPER BOWL. YA.

Can I just say football players need new uniforms.Seriously, their butts looked HUGE. It looked like a pillow was stuffed insidetheir uniforms. Just saying.

Wouldn’t it be funny if the football players were alltackling each other for the ball, BUT the ball was not even there? Some guycould be running with the ball and nobody would notice because they weretackling each other. That would make my day.

Football teams need more creative plays. If I was a footballcoach I would have my team burst into song. For example, my team would sing “Bornthe Way” by Lady Gaga. The opposing team would be like “WHAT??” And thensomebody could run and get a touchdown. I should coach.

If I was a football player I would be a kicker. The kickerrarely ever gets hurt. During practice the kicker does not have to run around,all the kicker has to do is kick. I would be a great kicker.

If I played basketball I would be the coach. The coach justruns around on the sidelines yelling, “PASS!!!” or “SHOOT!!!” I honestly, thinkI would be really good at that. My experience is I won 50 dollars in a MarchMadness draw. I just chose based on which school had a better name and morefives.

If I was a soccer player…I take that back I would never be asoccer player. I would have a hard time remembering not to use my hands. Iplayed soccer for half a season. I scored one goal. In the opposing teams net.Oops.

If I was a softball player I would be an outfielder. As anoutfielder I could check my phone, build sandcastles in the back, and reenactthe opening scene in The Sound of Music.I would be a legendary outfielder.

If I was a swimmer I would win. I was on the swim team inelementary school. I got first place in my first race. After that I told my momafter the race that I had “peaked” and I was done with the sport.

I almost forgot about gymnastics. I did gymnastics for eightyears. After eight years I got one thing out of gymnastics. I can do acartwheel. I honestly, think I was too talented for gymnastics. The coachesjust did not know how to coach me effectively. Also, it could have been thefact that I talked the entire practice. But, that is nothing new.

In the end, I think my potential in athletics has beenoverlooked. I could totally go to the Olympics. I would be a top contender inthe Senior Olympics. Seriously, I am too good to compete with people my ownage. The real competiton is in the senior division.

I get my license tomorrow. If I were you I would stay offthe roads. Kiss the pavement when you get home.

YOU ARE WELCOME.

P.S. Follow Your Daily Dose of Brooke on twitter, @BloggingBrooke! Any questions for YOU ASKED IT THURSDAY email me at brooketheblogger@aol.com

Solving the World's Problems. Brooke Style.

Welcome to SOLVING THE WORLD PROBLEMS SATURDAY!!!

Problem one: KARDASHIAN MARRIAGE FAKE OR NOT??  I am offended that people think the Kardashian marriage was a fake. Everyone knows that Kris Humphries was a two. He plays basketball in Minnesota. Seriously, that is almost as bad as playing basketball in Iowa. No offense.

Kim Kardashian only had three dress changes for her wedding. When I find a five, I am going to have five dress changes for my wedding.

Problem two: ONLY 24 HOURS IN A DAY. These 24 hour days are incredibly inconvenient. I propose we move to 50 hour days. People could get so much more done. I know all you science people are saying, “50 hour days are not scientifically possible.” DO NOT WORRY ABOUT THE DETAILS. Someone just needs to work on redesigning the standard clock.

Problem three: MAINTAINING HOMEOSTASIS. This is a huge problem. Being cold all the time is so annoying. I propose someone genius invents a pill that helps maintain homeostasis. I will endorse the pill on this blog. 

Problem four: AMERICA'S HUGE DEFICIT. It does not take a rocket scientist to realize that a government should not spend more money than the government earns. The solution is simple: SELL ALL THE NATIONAL MONUMENTS. The United States government could sell The Washington Monument. How about selling Mount Rushmore? The Lincoln Memorial could use a FOR SALE sign too!  

If you have ever been to The Lincoln Memorial you know how depressing the gift shop is. My closet is bigger than the gift shop at The Lincoln Memorial.

Our government just does not know how to run a monument. Private enterprise does. If the monuments were run by private enterprise think how awesome they would be. I guarantee that the gift shops would get so much better.

If I was president, national monuments would be FOR SALE.

That is all for SOLVING THE WORLDS PROBLEMS SATURDAY. Do not forget, KEEP CALM AND LOOK FOR FIVES.

YOU ARE WELCOME.

P.S. Become a member of this blog! All you have to do is click on “Join this sight” on the top of the right column. Also follow Your Daily Dose of Brooke on twitter @BloggingBrooke for the on the spot updates.

I CANNOT WAIT TO RETIRE

I was going to do a post about French Camp but then I started writing this.

I really cannot wait to retire. I have not even held a job yet, but, I am looking forward to partying at the nursing home.

When I was in elementary school during the summer my parents dropped me off at our country club every morning and picked me up at night. My parents called it, “Semi-Free Child Care”, what great role models I have.

Anyway, back on topic. I was a member of the synchro team. You can laugh now. I worked the spandex swimming suit. During practice instead of frolicking in the water, like most of the other kids, I sat/tanned/looked for fives with the coaches and helped them through their personal drama. I was told I would make a good therapist. In reality, I just did not want to put my nose plugs on.

Along with being “child therapist” I told my coaches what I was going to do when I grew up. The list included: Traveling around the world in 79 days, salsa dancing with Anderson Cooper, earning a Oscar for…being me, paying someone to write a book under my name, marrying a five, star in my own reality TV show, host the Today Show, become the moderator of Meet the Press, sky dive with the Native Americans, buy a Golden Globe, just to name a few. In other words, I did not learn any synchro that summer.

After an entire summer of being the “child therapist” Awards Night came around. Most kids got awards for being, “Best Dancer”, “Rookie of the Year”, and “Little Fish”. I received the award for…..drum roll please…..cue the trumpets……”Most Likely to Retire Early”.

If you do not believe me, my mother framed the certificate.

Receiving the “Most Likely to Retire Early” award is hands-down my proudest moment.

At a young age I knew the workplace was not for me. I think my coaches knew me too well.

I have no intention of ever going to a nursing home. But, I do have every intention of retiring very early.

Tomorrow is SOLVING THE WORLD PROBLEMS SATURDAY. Get excited. YOU ARE WELCOME.

P.S. Follow me on twitter @BloggingBrooke, for instantaneous updates on new posts.

YOU ASKED IT THURSDAY!!!

Today is YOU ASKED THURSDAY!!! Lots of questions this week. YA!!

1) How do you feel about the fake twitter account of our school principal? I think whoever is doing it needs a hobby. Seriously, if you make a fake twitter account THAT IS A SIGN YOU NEED TO FIND SOMETHING TO DO like, read my blog.  Plus, it is embarrassing to our school. One person’s actions affect the entire school.

2) What is the meaning of life? I answered this one before. It is still the same. KEEP CALM AND LOOK FOR FIVES.

3) What came first? The Chicken or the Egg? Honestly, who cares??? I would totally eat a chicken before I ate an egg. My stomach tells me chicken.

4) What do you prefer: Rap or Classical? Classical, I cannot do homework without classical music. Do not get me wrong, I adore rap. In fact, I have entitled myself, “The Next Enimen”

5) Do fives drink alcoholic beverages? I mean, wine is considered to

be classy. Right? Yes, but fives know their limit. And a five always brings a hot date, like myself to be the designated driver.

6) What languages would you like to learn in the future? None, I was sent to a two week French Immersion camp a summer ago. Ever since French Immersion camp I cannot bring myself to learn a language. French camp was traumatizing. Let’s just say I did not eat a full meal for two weeks. I lost 10 pounds. It was horrible. J’ai deteste French Camp.

I am looking for a five who knows several languages, to make up for my traumatizing expirence. Or I will just buy the iPhone app.

7) Feathered hair extensions.. yay or nay? Nay. You look like a Native American. Honestly, are you about to go to a Pow Wow?? Didn’t think so.

8) Favorite president of all time? William Howard Taft, fattest president of all time. So fat, he got stuck in the White House bathtub. The fire department had to get him out.

9) Guys who are intelligent or guys with extremely good looks? Both, I do not settle. Fives are both intelligent and hot.

10) Favorite Disney CLASSIC movie? Disney classic movies are sexist. In EVERY SINGLE MOVIE, the needy girl has to end up with a “prince” or else the damsel in distress cannot function in the world. Disney is teaching young girls, “if you do not find a prince, your life will suck”. If I had to choose a movie though, it would totally be HSM, HSM2, and HSM3. I know all the words. And Troy Bolton and I are going to get married.

 Keep emailing me questions! And follow me on twitter! You can find my email and twitter in previous blogs. 

That is all for YOU ASKED IT THURSDAY!! YOU ARE WELCOME.

P.S. Tomorrows blog is entitled, "French Camp" 

Meet Sensai.

Good shows should be on more than once a week. I do not want to have to wait an entire week to watch my favorite show. Actors and actresses already get paid a lot. I do not think it would be asking too much for there to be new show every other day.

It is time for all of you to meet my car. My cars name is Sensai (Sen-say). You know, like a Japanese master?? Sensai, is older than I am. Sensai is a horrible shade of grey. But, Sensai has a lot of character. Sensai is beautiful.

I named Sensai after my much loved drivers ed instructor, Jonathan. My partner and I asked Jonathan what he wanted to be called. He responded with Sensai. From then on, my car full of character was Sensai.

I passed drivers ed with a 76%. You need 75% to pass. I am a great driver. No joke.

Before I drive I have a mantra I like to speak out loud to myself. It goes like this: I can do it. I can do it. I am a focused driver. I am a amazing driver. Driving is easy for me. Parallel parking is a piece of cake. I am the bomb of the road. I am amazing. I can drive. I will check my mirrors. I will read all the signs. I am the best.

My mantra works. I have not gotten in a car accident yet. I have only killed two birds and two squirrels. ALL THANKS TO THE MANTRA.  R.I.P. The two squirrels and the two birds I hit. They died in combat with the great Sensay. But, they did not win.

When February 7^th rolls around if I were you, after I get home from school I would get out of the car and kiss the pavement. Because on February 7^th Brooke Beatty and Sensai are becoming the bombs of the road.

YOU ARE WELCOME.