I Honestly Can't Tell You Why I Am Watching The Bachelorette

I am watching I am watching The Bachelorette for the first time.

“I have met the love of my life”

“It’s going to feel so good for her to tell me she loves me too”

“I just can’t decide”

“I know she wants to tell me she loves me”

“I made a love potion for you”

“It smells so good. You did such a great job”

“Ari, will you wait for me?”

“I give so much, I am so open and I am a loving person. I feel like I deserve that back”

“It’s unreal that it’s over”

“I want the picture in my mind to come true”

“There has always been something in my past relationships that have held me back”

“You really are everything that I lived for so long.”

“I feel like the luckiest man in the world. I smile so big. There is something about us.”

“I am so grateful that we are there”

“When the road was hard and tough. I am so grateful that you didn’t run away. Because I found my everything.”

“What I am about to ask you is a forever thing.”

I can’t type this fast.

“O my gosh Jeff is so hot.” –Brooke

Do people actually talk to each other like this in relationships? This is like a Hallmark movie times a million.

I’m sorry I can’t stop laughing right now. THIS GIRL HAS 16 GUYS COMPETING FOR HER. AND SHE STILL CAN’T DECIDE. If I had 16 guys competing for me, I honestly don’t know what I would do, but I am 100% positive I would not make a love potion with them. 100% positive.

I would totally choose Ari by the way. He’s a race car driver and Jeff is an entrepreneur. We all know “entrepreneur” is code for I don’t really know what I do.

O MY GOSH THE AUIDENCE IS CRYING. THIS IS GOLD.

This girl has 16 boyfriends practically handed to her, I don’t even have one five. WHY IS SHE FEELING SORRY FOR HERSELF? Honestly, do the American women a favor and make a decision.

Good she chose Jeff. Ari deserves someone better….me.

I watched Best in Show last night. Everyone needs to watch that movie. It was hilarious on so many levels.

I went to the pool today. I didn’t know they sold bikinis for 4-year-olds.

I worked at VBS this past week. They changed the words of “I’m Sexy and I Know It” to “God Loves Me and I Know It” I am sorry, but as much as I love VBS that is just too much.

Okay, its official guys I am the future bachelorette.

YOU ARE WELCOME.